Ninety days in...

Sometimes being the first to have a baby in my close group of friends (in Minneapolis) can get lonely. I can no longer be spontaneous in my plans and don't have much interest in going out every weekend night anymore. I was hoping that just maybe some of my "friends" would take some time to hang out and not go out drinking so we could spend time together, but I guess that was just wishful thinking. I'm even contemplating getting rid of my cell phone...doesn't make much sense to spend all that money for just a handful of phone calls a month. Having a baby who has "special needs" makes it even more isolating. I want to find a play group for Gavin to join, but I am worried about finding a group of mom's who understand exactly how important it is to keep their sick kids away...even just a cold can be harmful. It can be so frustrating.

Now don't get me wrong...Gavin is the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me, it just didn't go as planned. We had planned on me going back to work as soon as he was big enough to go to daycare. Well, scratch that since its highly recommended for us to avoid daycares if at all possible, it's just too germy. Now we are looking into getting a nanny so I can help to bring some income into our household, but what is the point of me going back to work if my entire paycheck would be used for an expensive nanny. We can't go on the "cheap" for a nanny because we need someone who is capable of taking care of Gavin's extra needs. So here I am perusing the internet for that dream job where I can work at home, nearly impossible to find in this disgusting economy.

this is all sinking in because Gavin is THREE MONTHS OLD TODAY! Where has time gone?

We've gone from this....

To this....

My little boy is getting so big!